And now I will demonstrate how to quickly crank out a Toastmaster meeting recap:

We met. We spoke. There was a lot of clapping.

Ta-da!

Jason ran the meeting as our Toastmaster. And once he quit blushing from Rey’s introduction of him, he did a fine job. Rey gave a perfect demo of how to give an introduction…of a Chippendale dancer. He showed he’s more than just a pretty face by keeping the meeting bumping and grinding along with just the right amount of commentary.

You can put lipstick on a pig or a hockey mom and Jenny would gladly take a jab at either. Politics aside, she did show us how to liberally incorporate the theme into table topics as our TTM.

What unfinished projects does Carol have in her closet? She has a cluttered closet in her closet. It drives her crazy! Luckily, she’s reading a book on how to unclutter your life. She’s going to tackle that closet next week right after she reads a how to not procrastinate book. Maybe.

What does Corky know how to do but pays other people to do instead? He says he’s only good at three things: cooking, drinking, eating and sex. Notice counting is not on that list. Nor is being discreet. He’ll keep doing those things himself but not accounting. If you ask him to do some accounting, he’ll just plug in numbers that benefit him and screw the government.

How can Stuart tell when someone is lying? He shows them how to make an origami bird of course. The seasoned Toastmaster demonstrated not only the practical art of paper folding but also how to be prepared for a table topic question – his paper bird was pre-folded for a quick demo. Unfortunately the question wasn’t how to make an origami bird but that didn’t stop him. A true pro.

Amy’s speech was a great presentation on how to do a ‘how to’ presentation. The idea for this presentation hit her when she was watching an online video of ‘how to pick up women’. Apparently the trick is to bend at the knees. Don’t use your back muscles! She provided a step by step approach of the step by step approach one should take in giving a ‘how to’ presentation. You should demo something you know how to do well, break it down into easy steps, maybe add props, costumes and nudity and entertain, inspire or allow people to get to know you better.

Staci showed us how to practice Ashtanga. I may be totally wrong here but I believe it’s a type of yoga practice or a system of yoga or not yoga at all. It’s an ordered series of postures, breathing and sweating like a pig. You breathe like Darth Vader while contracting your fun muscles while you gaze at your body parts. I encourage you to ask Staci more about it because I cannot do it justice. I recommend having her show you how bendy she is.
Ania speech topic was how to impede progress and sabotage your life. Ania says our TM club is a group of overachievers (frankly, I think most of you need a lot of work). We are scaring away potential club members with our excellence. We need to:

1) quit showing off our numerous ribbons
2) accept speech assignments 2hrs before a meeting
3) chew gum when we speak so we drool, mispronounce words and possibly choke

Mediocrity is where we need to set the bar!

There were valuable evaluations but I gotta keep these recaps brief man! Can’t we just video the meeting and post it on You Tube?

Ribbon winners -
Most Wonderful Table Topic Involving Folded Paper – Stuart
Most Ironic Winner of Best Speech – Ania
Best Evaluator Named Wendy – Wendy
Most Enthusiastic Contractor of Fun Muscles – Staci
Funniest Person With Parents at the Meeting – Ania

Check out this link to ‘how to’ videos Amy referenced in her speech http://www.videojug.com