As Toastmaster for the day, Amy gave a colorful explanation of the annual rivalry between men and women in our club, which is an issue close to her fridge via an article about a man serving only 30 days in prison for killing his wife because everyone knew she was a *#*.  Stuart gave an equally biased invocation angling for the guys to win.  Olivia was still in shock from the cold weather, and declared a very appropriate word of the day – frigid. 

Jessica led the girls v. guys Table Topics, where high school seemed to play a prominent role in particpants’ stories.  Taline educated us on how men so easily mistake personal grooming for flirting and Stuart tried to recall any romantic advice he’d been given by sharing a story about wooing a high school girl… to no avail.  Carol gave us a very spirited diatribe on what bothers her about men at sporting events, including ridiculous body art and unnecessary bikinis at boxing matches.  Todd taught us that we shouldn’t make assumptions if we’re going to have decent relationships – who knows when a phone could fall in a toilet?!  The battle was a tough one, so Jessica pressed on with one last Table Topics match.  Walter’s tales of V-day gifting and waiting to watch the news until the kids’ cartoons are over were followed by Lora’s passionate explanation of what women actually do when they’re “primping,” and how there is no way men could handle giving birth.   Did this thought make anyone else think of the ’80s show Alien Nation?

We had two amazing ice-breaker speeches today!  Shane was up first with pastor-like speaking abilities and poise.  After a hurricane, starting a church and a stint at Starbucks, he’s now a realtor and a natural Toastmaster!  Marc’s funny saga about how he got from Mississippi to Austin had a brilliant underlying message about not being afraid of change – all this from a lawyer!  Katy’s and Lee’s evaluations both expressed excitement about our newest members’ natural abilities and encouragement to build on those skills.  Lee also reminded us all that the big picture is more important than remembering exact details.  Corky summed it all up as General Evaluator with his sage wisdom and advice to keep the audience in mind and learn from others. 

It was a heated battle, but in the end… the girls swept all categories!  Congrats to the girls, to everyone who braved the frigid weather and to our new members who broke the ice with gusto!

Table Topics Master Li got eight – count ‘em – eight people involved with her questions, both during Table Topics, and during the bonus round at the end of the meeting. Cynthia, new member Marc, guest Todd, new member Vince, Stuart, Robin, Becky, and new member Shane spoke of old cars, new cars, cars they loved, cars they’d love to wrap in bubble wrap, and cars with doors that don’t work but relationships that do. With wreckless abandon, Table Topics participants picked up spare parts of other people’s topics, which is why we learned how nice the airport workers are in England, and how  helpful policemen can be, as long as you don’t call 911 when you have car trouble, and how cold-hearted Boston is when it comes to towing cars..

Olivia ripped the room apart with a terrific Ice Breaker. Olivia got the audience revved up by listing all of the things she wasn’t going to talk about at the beginning of the speech – her career playing full-contact women’s football (yes it’s true, I could not make this up), her history as a fighter, her kids, her grandkids – no, she would not be talking about any of that.  She talked about LOVE.  And love her we did. Evaluator Stuart gave Olivia plenty of encouragement to move forward, full speed ahead, building on the skills she already has.  She is warm, open, funny, fascinating, high-energy; in short, the sort of person we want to listen to and get to know.  Stuart also suggested that Olivia start strong and end strong, to go with all that dynamite delivery in the middle.

Amy shared the secrets of How to Destroy Your Chances of Getting That Job. In a nutshell, don’t care much and let it show.  Or care too much and smother your prospective future supervisor with your neuroses before you even start working for her. Evaluator Robert praised Amy’s use of alliteration and humor, but picked on her for inadvertently clicking her heels together like Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz.

It was great to see Lora Schneider! We have missed her! She presided over the evaluation portion of the meeting with wit and wisdom and warmth, which went well with her beautiful red hair.

Congratulations to our ribbon winners:

Best Table Topic: Todd (guest)

Best Speaker: Amy

Best Evaluator: Stuart

Most Enthusiastic: Olivia

Best use of humor: Amy

Next Week: our traditional annual anti-Valentine’s “Battle of the Sexes” meeting!

Congrats to the ribbon winners!

Table Topic: Shane

Best Speaker: Heather

Best Evaluator: Amy

Most Enthusiastic: Heather

Best use of humor: Lee

Thanks to Katy for doing the recap!

Congrats to the ribbon winners!

Table Topic: Carol

Best Speaker: Jessica

Best Evaluator: Patrick

Most Enthusiastic: Carol

Best Use of Humor: Katy

Apparently a lot of folks out there made a New Year’s resolution to join Toastmasters.  Oh we had guests yesterday.  And we had a meeting that knocked their socks off.

Robert Horan was our Topic Master.  He asked, and members explained How To. Cynthia was hilarious with a thinly-veiled tutorial on How To Keep Men Busy when you want them to leave you alone: teach them to clean. Taline inspired us with a brief speech rarely heard – How to Love Your Job.  And our newest member – we’re pretty sure he paid – spoke about teaching his non-existent dog How To Be a Butler.

In keeping with the How To theme, Brian demonstrated How To Get Out of a Headlock. He brought a giant mat, and  he brought his own human subject to demonstrate on: his son Daniel. As if describing each move in detail wasn’t enough, Brian told stories of real-life situations where these moves have come in handy, and had us in stitches with his helpful hints on how to remember these manuevers. Daniel really stole the show though, appearing in front of a group with composure and confidence rarely seen in a young man his age.  Evaluator Heather suggested we start charging admission to our meetings, and counseled against trying to steal the silverware if invited to Brian’s house for dinner.

Robin did a speech entitled FOH – which stands for Front Of House; “Front” meaning sales area or dining room and “House” meaning restaurant. In short order, he taught us the restaurant business from an insider’s point of view.  All those things you thought waiters did behind your back?  Yes, they do do these things, and they do say these things. But they have a code.  Moral of the story?  Tip your waitstaff.  Evaluator Lee praised the way Robin “owned it.”  His confidence, his organization, his command of the material, and his oh-so-quick wit had Lee believing that Robin actually owned the restaurant as well as owning our meeting room during his presentation.

Louis explained how he lost 15 pounds and how he was planning to gain it back.  This was not an emotional story of fighting an addition to chocolate chip cookies and bacon and then succumbing.  It was a methodical account of steps taken to lose weight with a specific exercise plan, accompanied by pie charts and bar graphs (just kidding, no pie charts).  Helpful books were recommended.  Daniel, our human punching bag in the first speech of the day, got to demonstrate his evaluation skills, since he is a member of the Gavel Club — Toastmasters for young people — at his school.  Another amazing display of what a teenager can become when guided expertly by his parents and his community, unlike Amy’s son, who cannot be trained to throw out an empty milk carton despite her best efforts.

How to go on without Albert?  Tough, but we worked through it.

A giant Thank You to all those who took roles at the last minute: Brian, Robert, Daniel, Heather, Carol, and Corky

Congrats to the ribbon winners!

Table Topic: Cynthia

Best Speaker: Brian

Best Evaluator: Daniel

Most Enthusiastic: Brian

Best Use of Humor: Robin

See you all next week!

Heather led some great table topic discussions about change.  We learned that Carol moved from Arlington to Austin in the face of strong objections from her out-of-state relatives who prefer theme parks and baseball to live music and nice views.  Li provided insight into her internal conflict about sharing personal details, Katy divulged her desire to be Superman, and Olivia, our newest member, was hilarious describing the recent transitions in her family.  We look forward to more of Olivia’s comfortable humor.

Cynthia got us excited about the new year with a speech about the pointless nature of New Year’s resolutions.  We all waited patiently for the inevitable choral finale, but had to wait until Brian coaxed it out of her during his evaluation.  Brad wowed us with his perfectly enunciated and frequent use of the word anthropomorphization, and he left us contemplating our interactions with the world around us.  Amy accepted the challenge to make us laugh in her evaluation, and brilliantly related Brad’s ideas to her own experiences with her “tech” friends.   Blake inspired everyone with his moving story, complete with pictures, about his grandfather’s football history.  Robin got straight to the point in his evaluation of Blake, which won him the honor of Best Evaluator.  Louis ended the meeting by sharing some ideas for how to deal with coworkers in a witty, biting sort of way.

Congrats to the ribbon winners!

Table Topic: Olivia

Best Speaker: Brad

Best Evaluator: Robin

Most Enthusiastic: Olivia

Best Use of Humor: Amy

and Kudos to Katy on her first recap as Capital City TM’s Secretary!  Great Job, Katy!

In his role as the True Confessions Table Topic Master, Blake went the extra mile. From now on, like Blake, every Topic Master shall wear a suit and tie, and run this section of the meeting game-show-host style. To protect the privacy of our participants, let’s just say that, collectively, our Table Topic Speakers Ashton (Guest), Bill, Heather, Lief, and Lora confessed to goofing off, gluttony, not knowing what “gluttony” means, lying, lying some more, slipping down a slippery slope, stealing in a literal sense, stealing in a figurative sense, and stealing some more.

Albert presented a speech about the endangered tiger, and, on a larger scale, our relationship with our planet and all the creatures on it. Robin, as Albert’s evaluator, and with all due respect for the Emperor, stated  that, while it is clear Albert is always eloquent and articulate, and has a buffet of basic skills, Albert was capable of more, particularly a more effective and strategic use of the video included in his presentation.

Our guest speaker, Tom, told us about the research he did to properly celebrate and take part in “Talk Like a Pirate Day” which falls on September 19th every year.  His speech was rated “Arrrrrrgghhhhhh!” Patrick evaluated this very funny speech, with praise for Tom’s preparation and structure, and recommendations for more volume; and for bigger, more relaxed body movement.

Congratulations to our Ribbon Winners!

Table Topic: Ashton (Guest)

Best Speaker: Tom (Guest Speaker)

Best Evaluator: Patrick

Best Humor: Tom (Guest Speaker)

Most Enthusiastic: Blake

No meeting next week!  If you need a Toastmasters fix, come to the Brick Oven for lunch at noon on Wednesday November 24, where members will meet for lunch and socializing.  “Arrrrrrgghhhhhh!”

Leeanne is on a roll, approaching each role lately with volume and enthusiasm. Leeanne was our Topic Master, and she gave Lief, new member Jessica, guest John, and Katy a chance to talk about both past and future regrets.

New member Blake used his Ice Breaker slot to practice part of a presentation he will be doing for a different audience, on strategies for making investments and coping strategies for dealing with the unpredictable nature of the stock market – both for investors and for those who choose trading as a career. Evaluator Carol praised Blake’s expertise and conviction and suggested that Blake assume a more authoritative stance, to appear more professional, confident, and in control.

Robin did a project from the Interpretive Reading Manual. He read a number of short poems by Ogden Nash, who was a genius; a poet of simplistic eloquence. Evaluator Lief claimed to be stumped by the task of evaluating Robin, since the presentation was not a speech with a structure, and it was never stated at the onset what the desired effect was supposed to be. This was a pretty clever way to approach it, but come on. Ogden Nash was cool and hip and edgy, and Robin is cool and hip and edgy, and that’s all you need to know.

Amy shared a number of reasons to say “Hooray For Beer!” – specifically Warsteiner Premium Dunkel, Paulaner Hefeweizen, and Spaten Octoberfest, all sampled at Wurstfest in New Braunfels. Beer is good. Beer is sweet. Beer can make you receptive to rethinking relationships. Beer can give you confidence, courage, and conviction. Beer can enhance your enjoyment of entertainment. The alliteration absolutely is no accident. Next year: Capital City Toastmasters field trip to Wurstfest! Evaluator Louis said several positive things then gave Amy grief about almost falling over during the speech.

Congratulations to our ribbon winners!

Best Table Topic: Jessica

Best Speaker: Amy

Best Evaluator: Lief

Best Humor: Amy

Most Enthusiastic: Amy

Best First Time Toastmaster: Brad

Regretfully, we did not get to hear more about regrets from our members. But don’t put the details of those regretful incidents away just yet – next week’s theme will be True Confessions!

First, the agenda was great. The template looked like an old-timey book.  For Stuart’s invocation, he hijacked great quotes about life and “repurposed” them into quotes about books, like “One good book deserves another”  “A book saved is a book earned” “People who live in glass houses shouldn’t throw books.”  Toastmaster Louis also had much profound and thought-provoking material to share on the subject of books.

Many had an opportunity to participate in Table Topics, and to essentially rant about how books had not helped them.   Robin has not read “Cather in the Rye,” or other classic books, or seen the classic movies, and he reserves the right to remain in the dark.  Carol doesn’t read because she’s too busy watching Dancing with the Stars.  Taline couldn’t get her niece to appreciate her favorite book, “The Outsiders.”   Stuart’s life is a meandering series of non-book-inspired stumbles and random events.  Corky of course has no use for books, or for people who care about books.  Future member Blake owns a stunning masterpiece of a cookbook but mostly likes to look at the pictures.  Cynthia spoke of a book that was significant in her youth but that’s all over now. New member Jessica deserves props for taking the question head on and sharing a recent experience of being thoroughly engaged and inspired by a book.   

We had only one speaker, our guest, Don.  He was great.  He spoke of the value of Toastmasters:  the memorable experience of that first speech, the nerves, the mistakes we make, the humiliation we endure.  Then later – months later – or years later — if we stick with it – we reap the benefits of hanging in there: the sense of community we have in our club, and the heights we can ascend to with proper skill development.  Evaluator Heather gave Don the praise he deserved for connecting with us on so many key points.  She also showed her contortionist skills with many bends and twists and wiggles leading to the ultimate smooth move of snagging both the Best Evaluator and Most Enthusiastic Ribbon! 

Thank you for being our guest speaker Don!

Congratulations to our Ribbon Winners!

Table Topic: Robin

Best Speaker: Don

Best Evaluator: Heather

Best Humor: Corky

Most Enthusiastic: Heather

October 20th that began with a singalong.  “My Generation” was a fitting theme for our club, which includes many generations.  It’s quite a trick how together we manage, each week, to bridge that generation gap. The new Loud Leeanne is living proof that it’s never too late to learn. Great job, Leeanne!

Table Topics are a bit of a blur at this point, but I believe Wendy won it with her cheeky comments on having sympathy but no empathy.

Corky practiced a speech he will be delivering at his daughter’s wedding. Luckily, Corky’s daughter will be a stunning gorgeous bride, otherwise she would run the risk  of being upstaged on her wedding day by Corky’s comedy and charisma. Carol was most complimentary, but suggested that Corky tighten it up a bit where it got repetitious.  We are all sure this speech will go off like a charm.

Did I miss something?  Do we now have an Advanced Toastmasters Manual called Creative Problem Solving With a Full Bladder?  Seems to be a recurring theme.  Folks, do not try this – only someone with Brad’s crazy likeability can manage to make a speech about peeing “outside the box” endearing and funny.  Somebody like Stuart, who just happened to be Brad’s evaluator.  Stuart suggested being a bit more subtle and dignified about it, but ultimately it is a matter of style. Brad just wants to pee all he can pee.

Zahra taught us how to become Internet Stalkers in a smooth, organized and informative presentation, which was also very clever.  Once she got going she was unstoppable.  Evaluator Amy gave Zahra props for being very well prepared and for bringing pertinent information to share with all of us.  Oh and she looked terrific.
 
Congratulations to our Ribbon Winners!

Table Topic: Wendy

Best Speaker: Brad

Best Evaluator: Stuart

Best Humor: Brad

Most Enthusiastic: Brad