Hey Hillbillies and HoundDogs!

Lora headed up the meeting today bringing some Sirius energy to a dog day afternoon. Patrick didn’t roll over and play dead on his job as Table Topic Master. Dressed for the weather (no suit), he barked out some great questions -

Who is the brightest star in Maureen’s life? Her little white doggy, Blanca (I think that’s her name)! Like many starlets, she’s jump starting her career by appearing in a magazine centerfold wearing nothing but fur. Blanca, that is.

If she could skip work and get away from the hot weather, what would Wendy do? She’d drag it out for weeks and weeks of course. She’d pass-out drunk on a tube on the Guadalupe – again, commune with goats and run away to Honduras. How cliche.

What makes Amy mad? 106 degree weather and a roommate that doesn’t believe in AC or phones! Smart thinking Amy cooled off by standing in ice water and finally got her own phone, fielding calls for the all night request radio station.

What crime would Bert commit? He’d violently attack his cell phone provider. Not sure if he meant each person in the company one at a time or all employees at once or just the CEO but someone would be violently attacked by a frustrated Bert. His anger was apparent as he peppered his speech with ‘crap’, thankfully just the word. He wouldn’t name his phone company but let’s just say he would happily sprint to another provider.

Rey addressed a group of advertising executives giving tips on how become a better speaker. She was polished and professional, passionate and purposeful, poised and perky. Useful tip from Rey – “Don’t hyperventilate!” But that’s how I end all my speeches! And – “Don’t pee yourself, unless it’s part of your speech!” That’s mine. I guarantee its effectiveness. Rey did a doggone good job providing nine great tips on speaking.

Louis had a lot of roommates in his life – 36. So at least one had to be crazy, right? OH YEAH. If you like giving someone steroid shots in the butt, well, Louis knows someone you should talk to. What’s a must on your wedding night? Pee on your bride. Tell her you thought you saw a jellyfish. QUOTE OF THE DAY – “It was around that time we found out that cats do not like eating Cheetos”.

Jenny generally evaluated. She spoke words. Albert evaluated Rey. He said some stuff. I evaluated Louis. I said amazing stuff.

Maria did a fine job as timer. Taline deserves the humor award with her pig on the beach joke. Stuart, drunk with power, cracked down on our grammatic oopsies. But he did give us drool.

Ribbon Winners -

Best Table Topic: Maureen “Who’s a good girl?!” McReynolds
Best Speaker: Reynetta “My wittle sweetie!” DeVeau
Best Evaluator: Albert “BAD! BAD BOY!” Cantara
Most Enthusiastic: Bert “What’d you do on the rug?!” VUNK
Best Use of Humor: Louis “I wish I could lick myself like that” Burns